Today is the 27th day of my quest to keep the faith about my twinflame reunion. It is 27 days already and yet, I know it has been a struggle the past couple of weeks; but today I feel the faith more than I have. The interesting thing that I am feeling right now is that the faith needs to be in him not simply in our reunion. I have faith in my beloved and his journey. I have faith he will find his way to me because he will remember who I am to him. Thank you! I have faith that his love for me will teach him love for himself and that is what will bring us full circle. I know he is mine and I am his: it has been that way since the beginning of time and this is the time it will all be. (By the way, the number 27 is the number day of his birthday so today has a little extra meaning for me and a real sign that I am exactly where I am supposed to be.)
Something I realized last evening on my drive home. Since I have met my twinflame, I have longed for him to be with me and the holidays; well, they always seemed to make me sad because he was not there with me. Last night, I was at dinner with a friend and felt his energy come around me. My perception in the restaurant changed; I looked around the restaurant and felt this longing to see him as if he would walk through the door. It has been some time since I have spoken to him as you all know, but it has been even longer since I have seen him. I know he is feeling it too.
Something occurred to me as I was driving home, I wasn't sad. I mean I often cried a day or few days before Valentine's Day because everywhere I looked was something about Valentine's Day. I cried because he wasn’t with me. I cried because he was supposed to be with me. I cried because he often didn’t acknowledge me. Instead last night, it felt only as if he was away and would be back soon; that there was no need to worry that he was not there, he would simply be here soon. Not only was that feeling different, but the whole energy in the last six months has been different. I mean I haven't even thought about it being Valentine's Day other than knowing it is the number day of Valentine's Day. Instead, I am well aware of how much I love I have in my life: I love my life, my new home and my experiences with all the people I love and are in my life. It doesn't mean that I don't wish he were here with me, it simply means that it truly is no different than any other day for me. Believe me that is an accomplishment. I think I owe that in part to being so far removed from the mainstream world that I don’t look for external sources to validate me or love me. I don’t feel inadequate; instead, I feel perfect as I am. The message that the media projects is inadequacy if you don’t have someone to spend Valentine’s Day with, the best way to combat it is to remove yourself from mainstream society and you will see how perfect you are, too!
No comments:
Post a Comment