Day 15 of 45 Day Journey: Mirroring

Good Morning Beautiful peeps,

I am starting day 15 with a magical feeling inside!  I am looking forward to what today will bring.  I share this day's message because I think understanding being a mirror is invaluable.   Today’s message is about Mirroring. People who come into our lives, whether they stay for a long or short time, they are mirrors reflecting back to us who we are and what we are projecting. Take a few moments to read the snippet below and some of my comments belowas always the questions at the bottom are for your journals...to help you with some self-discovery.


OUR MIRROR
Author Unknown
The good you find in others, is in you too.
The faults you find in others, are your faults as well.
After all, to recognize something you must know it.

The possibilities you see in others,
are possible for you as well.
The beauty you see around you, is your beauty.
The world around you is a reflection,
a mirror showing you the person you are.

To change your world, you must change yourself.
To blame and complain will only make matters worse.
Whatever you care about, is your responsibility.
What you see in others, shows you yourself.

See the best in others, and you will be your best.
Give to others, and you give to yourself.
Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful.
Admire creativity, and you will be creative.

Love, and you will be loved.
Seek to understand, and you will be understood.
Listen, and your voice will be heard.
Teach, and you will learn.

Show your best face to the mirror,
and you'll be happy with the face looking back at you.

This concept of mirroring applies to every relationship, particularly to the twinflame relationship.  Since I am a twinflame I can attest to this really being the case in my experience.  Often what is happening on half of the twinflame couple is often happening in the other half of the twinflame couple by way of reverberating into the other's reality.  As a twinflame, we mirror everything that our twinflame does---it doesn't matter the location/age/religion--our experiences are very similar and unique to our soul connection.  For example: My beloved became a lawyer the year that I declared in high school that I wanted to be a lawyer.   The year my beloved got married was the same year that I was supposed to get married. Now mind you, being the more awake/aware twinflame in this relationship I made choices that altered my path into the direction of spirituality and chose not to be a lawyer and not to get married. If you are a twinflame, recognize what is going on in your world is connected to your beloved--the good, bad, indifferent is likely happening in their world too. For more about this, check out my recent post on Twinflames .

Here are some tips about mirroring and something for you to ponder.

How do you start to view the mirrors in your life? Often the mirrors are the aspects in other people that invoke passion within us. That passion could be on either end of the spectrum from happiness to anger. Those feelings (reactions) to the people in our life reveal to us the mirror.

Does the person in your life reveal anger when you think of them? Does that mean you need to look at the anger? Are they opening you to getting in touch with your anger or does their behavior reflect the way you handle a similar situation?Does the person make you feel connected? Does the person show you the love that you are? Do they help you to reveal your beauty?

These are the questions to look at when you are trying to navigate your way through this journey called life. It is only then that you are able to see what is there.

If you want to change the mirror, find people you admire and learn from them. Note what it is that you admire (you have that in you too) you just may need some help in accessing that part of you. Remember the mirror is all about learning what we are projecting to the world and what it is we choose to have reflected by to us.

Channeled Message: You are the Navigator of the Journey to Your Twinflame Union

Hello Everyone,

Just a quick brief message that I have received recently--the time for twinflames is here.  The Gateway is still open. It is a time for miracles to happen, but you know who makes them happen?  You do!  You do by way of clearing your baggage/karma/stuff that keeps you stuck, by allowing love in even when you are scared and pushing through the fear that has held you back.

I've been getting very clear messages lately and noticing it with my friends/clients that the next wave of twinflames are being awakened.  Do you know what that means?  That means that those of us, that have been on this path for some time, (myself 10 years soon to go onto 11 next year)and have struggled to maintain our truth, trust in our journey and have faith in our twinflame unions are now beginning to see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.  That means twinflames are coming together.  It is happening!  Don't give up when we are so close.  I've been trying to sit down and write this out for a few weeks now, but could never do it.  Today, my guides are prompting me to write a message to you because I need to remember it too!   We are so close--let's not waver.

Ok, so I didn't stick with this channel on Thanksgiving morning--quite honestly I could have stayed home all day and stayed in channel, but instead I went to my parents and came home angry, upset and ready for bed.  I spent my Friday and Saturday cleaning---so necessary and now today I am in a better place to channel and well it isn't so brief anymore. I included my comments for expansion or clarity upon what my guides channeled below.I have been working with my Galactic Team of Beings that assist both my beloved and me in our day to day life. Within the Team, I have often called on all Twinflames in Successful Union to come in and help us; that is who I am channeling below.

Onto the Channeled Message...

Greetings Dear Ones,

It is with with love, honor and respect that we bring you a message of love on this day . Your day of thanksgiving .  So much has transpired in way of love blocks being removed. All the fears you or your beloved have held onto have been raised up to the light for clearing.  Dear ones, you are experiencing the miracles in your day to day life, are you not?  See them and hold onto them for those are the things that will keep you in high vibration and ultimately pave the way for you and your beloved to come together.  We ask you to refrain from patterns and behaviors that keep you distracted or stuck. You are the light of the world and you need to remember that.  We are here to remind you of that truth.  We know how important you all are to this time on your earth. We need you and your beloved to unite to change the very fabric of the earth's consciousness.  We encourage you to embrace your fears and really look at what is that is not working in your life.  It is as simple as looking at where you are having difficulties is where your beloved mirrors you whether in the same way of you or in the opposite way.  For you are so filled with love and you bring all of that love and more right to your beloved--and your beloved is perhaps in the opposite vibration, fearful of the power that is coming toward him/her.  It isn't meant to be a push-pull situation between the twinflames, but it truly becomes one when one is consciously embracing who they are while the other is not conscious.  Oftentimes it is the masculine that is not fully embracing and the feminine typically is the one embracing who they are.  (That is not to say that the males are not doing their jobs and the females are--you carry both aspects within you.  My guides have discussed this once before in an earlier channel regarding twinflames. One half of the twinflame couple carries more masculine and the other half carries more feminine.  It doesn't matter who is physically male and who is physically female.: Breakfast with Magdalene & Yeshua.)

Dear ones, it is never one person in fear--it is both--that is what this journey is about.  While one twinflame may be further along than their divine counterpart, it doesn't mean they are free from all their fears; for only a twinflame could stir up fears in their other half even that have been dormant or layers have been cleared. (You may think you been there done that, but there are truly layers to healing and your twinflame will kick all that dust up for you to truly clear out the layers of that fear/pattern/behavior.) This dance of union between beloveds brings you to a place where all your fears are brought up so that the powerful energy between you will not cause harm when you are together.  When you first met your twinflame you or either they were in a balanced place for their life at that level.  Upon the meeting you both had tipped the scales, raised your vibration and placed you in another level of ascension where ultimately another layer/level of clearing could take place and sent you both out on your own healing journeys.  (In essence, each time you raise in vibration, the more opportunities for healing will appear.  A deeper layer of the issue will surface until you get to the core cause of it.  As twinflames we came in here to clear from humanity and its templates all that is not in alignment with the new, higher love frequency. That means each of us separately took on old templates when coming into this lifetime for the purpose of clearing and removing those things. It may appear some took on more than others, but the truth is that each of us have taken on our own set of templates/stuff/pain/trauma..it may be different, but it still looks/feels/seems like ick to me!)

We keep emphasizing that you must heal you and as a result it will heal the other half of you, your beloved.  Dependent upon where you are on your journey, some of you need to focus upon your own well being--your own fears, doubts, negativity in order for your twin's road to be paved more smoothly.  Others are further a long and need to assist their beloved in making the next step--either way your focus and priority must be you.  For if you remove the focus from your footsteps---then you stop moving forward, and essentially, your beloved stops moving forward.  We ask you to continue to move forward, trusting your mission, trusting your soul, and trusting your beloved, trust them to make their steps whether you are in contact with them or not.  If one twin is further along on their journey know that you are the keeper of the flame of that union and it is your responsibility to carry that vibration of love forward regardless of the fear that may come up.  (If you are reading this, then you are likely the Keeper of the Flame.  Yes, it may seem that you are doing all the work right now, but it isn't about what one does or the other one does--keeping score/keeping track is a worry/belief that is part of the old paradigm/old relationship energy--we have come here to clear those things so if you are in a twinflame relationship--do not allow yourself to get caught up in that trap.)  Since you are the keeper of the flame, that means you are the one on the front line facing all kinds of drama, trauma and darkness  multidimensionally; it is important for you to be vigilant because you have the awareness to assist your union simply by understanding the process of clearing that must occur.  What you may not realize dear ones, is that you are the more powerful half of your twinflame relationship because you have the awareness, the tools and ability to make the union happen in the physical reality if that is what you both have chosen in this lifetime.   Your beloved, the other half of the twinflame relationship, is in their own front line with a human template embedded deeper into the 3D drama and trauma.   The more you are okay the more your twin will be okay.  The more you are in fear the more amplified your fear will make theirs and in the reverse as well. Do you understand why we say focus should be upon you?  It is you that navigates the journey and yes from time to time you will need assistance, but know that you are the driver.  (As the Keepers of the Flame, our job is to hold for certain the space of love, our mission and our union without wavering even when it seems hopeless, hard or impossible--you are the navigator--energy follows where your focus goes. Do what you can to keep your focus on your union and mission and when you are pulled into doubt/fear/drama be sure to quickly extricate yourself from it. The things that occur day to day that I have to come in contact with cause all kinds of doubts and fears to come up and for the most part--I am getting better at navigating, but there have been some open wounds that have caused me to get caught up in it. My advice is to find a friend that is on this journey as well to help pull you through--someone who can be your faith when you are in doubt. It is always better to have someone who is a twinflame because they will continual understand what it is you are going through, but sometimes you don't have another twinflame around you and you may need to rely on a friend who doesn't fully get it--you can talk with them but realize that they may not always be able to understand or hold faith for you.  This journey can be lonely because not everyone can understand this kind of love, this kind of relationship paradigm--it isn't what it appears on the surface--our job as twins is to clear the old relationship paradigm.  To clear old relationship paradigm is far more than simply the love relationship--it means clear up cultural/traditional/religious/societal/sexual/financial etc. beliefs that have an impact on relationships--yep, you guessed it--everything does! No one on this path--not even those in union are immune to clearing/healing those parts of themselves that are up for clearing.)

Look at your patterns differently than you have in the past and choose to learn from them. It is always a choice to view obstacles and obstructions as a learning curve.  They need not be stuck too long. This full moon has released pressure that has been building up for the last few weeks now.  The feel of resistance has been pervasive in your reality.  Some of you may have been feeling sad, lonely lost or even angry. Some of you may have noticed resistance over the last few weeks particularly with regard to things you have had to do to maintain your normal everyday 3D life, that is simply because those things are not necessary in the 5D expansive energy, but unfortunately as you are shifting they are still necessary in the 3D life you are currently living.  You and your beloved have been bouncing this energy of resistance back and forth; thereby amplifying the effects.

Our Channel EstaRa has been experiencing a great deal of anger of late--in the form of short-temperedness--she has been carrying a great deal of pain and frustration from the years of work that she has performed on the earth. She has been carrying and absorbing pain and frustration from so many over the years that at some point it needs to be released.    As  her beloved faces his deepest darkest fears, his anger raises and amplifies the energy in her direction; and like a percolating coffee pot she explodes into what turns into short- temperedness; and humanity responds by giving her opportunities to feel it.  She has been resisting this channel for some time as she knew it would bring up a release on some level.  Her beloved has been holding on so tightly to that which he fears and on some agreement level she too was holding on for him, and not allowing this energy to come through her until the force of the full moon energy made it possible to release.  Ask her what her last few days have been leading up to the full moon?  What she humanly does not know is that her beloved is experiencing it too, but on a far greater internal scale than she can imagine as she has done more movement of energy than he has.   

What we are trying to show you is that humanity is very fearful of what they do not know and it builds in them until finally it needs to come out.  With all the timelines collapsing, appearing and disappearing over this earth year, things have come up over and over again for final releasing while other levels of pain, suffering, trauma have showed up for you to explore in how that template is or is not working. 

The energy from now until January is ripe with opportunities for twinflame couples to heal some serious wounding from this lifetime and other lifetimes.  There will be opportunities to come into physical union and opportunities to expand their power as a couple as well.  This is possible if one or both are willing.   Do they have to consciously be aware, you ask?  We say that only one has to be consciously aware to help nudge energetically the other along.  Energetic nudging doesn't require any communication with the other person's being or energy field--it is simply by way of doing what you must do for your own clearing/releasing/fears etc.  This imparts the clearing energies to your beloved to receive at the time that is most appropriate upon their journey.  (It is important to recognize that everything you do daily impacts your beloved.  I am not sure what you all feel--but I feel everything with my twinflame:  his body aches, when he eats bad and feel when he is thinking of me and so, so much more!  My belief is, then of course he feels/experiences what I do as well--now he may not be able to consciously say "April cleared my heart chakra today--I feel lighter", but I know it is assisting him because when we do talk--I can recognize the changes in him.  It may show up in his reality as experiencing more self love or someone being understanding with him; helping him to love himself more.  I also know when I am in a bad place--it amplifies for him any bad place he is in; but as mentioned above as the Keeper of the Flame, it is my responsibility to keep raising my/our vibration.  As much as I sometimes see this journey as so much work, I take comfort and find hope in knowing that what I am doing is really having an impact on his experiences as well.  Another quick example, when I talk about him, oftentimes I get the distinct feeling he knows I am talking about him--again he may not know what I am saying, but he feels me thinking of him.)

As humanity continues to awaken, more and more opportunities will arise for the twinflames to come together in union.  The light upon the planet is paving the way for you by shining down upon you the energy to clear all darkness out of your way. Raise yourself up in the light and your beloved will raise as well. We wish for you to find the place within you that holds an unwavering faith in your journey and mission.  We ask you to live from that space even when all circumstances appear otherwise.  This is the difficulty most humans have on this path, but we are here to assist you.  We love you and are here for you, with you and to assist you.

We are the Twinflame Collective working through EstaRa's Galactic Team.

Day 14 of 45 Day Journey

Good Day Beautiful Ones,

The other day I came across the following quote by Myrlie Evers , “I have reached a point in my life where I understand the pain and the challenges; and my attitude is one of standing up with open arms to meet them all!”

Isn’t that an amazing attitude to have? What a beautiful life it would be if we all could do that. I have to honestly say that I discovered that there is much truth and peace in that statement. A few years ago, I easily found that choosing to live life that way made me more present in my day and life was a lot less complicated. It was absolutely incredible.
However, what I found was that some things happened in my life that caused me to become out of balance in my life and my energy, particularly the car accident. Being human and having so many human experiences happen all at once, it made me overwhelmed which in essence made me want to deal with life’s challenges less and less. As a result, I lost my way a little bit and was reminded to put me first. So often, I forget and jump off the path of healing and so often I am blessed to have my angels, my guides and my life experiences remind me. And, if I am paying enough attention to them I will quickly get back together and if I am not it may take a little longer.

The quote above reminded me to look at my life again. A few things came to my attention this past week.  Yesterday the day after Thanksgiving, I spent the whole day in my house and cleaned—did I say clean?   What prompted this cleaning/clearing?  I was very emotional—carrying the energy from Thanksgiving—everyone’s emotions/feelings/thoughts.  The last several days I have been really angry and emotional—I realize it wasn’t all mine, but every time I felt something, came in the door—I unloaded it in my house.  So when I woke up yesterday, I told myself it would not be an ordinary day. I just started to clean off my desk of all the piles.  (if you know my home—my desk always gets everything piled on it—sometimes nice piles—other times not so nice piles.)  Those piles reflected the past three years of my life since the car accident with bills/collection notices/pain/suffering—my physical cleaning represented the closing out of the last three years—it occurred to me this morning that that is what I was doing.  I do feel like this new year coming is going to be grand!  Yes, I still have the bills/pain etc---and a little more to go in the physical reality, but the truth is that I don’t have to stay emotionally or mentally stagnant.  It is always a choice on what we do with the feelings as they come up.  I am definitely not saying don’t feel—because here is the biggest truth that you will ever find/learn/remember—you must feel to heal. Oftentimes, the new age movement focuses solely on spread happy, joy, joy;  and forgets that if you don’t allow yourself to feel that is the trap that people fall into creating/reliving/stagnating in karmic patterns.  

We are given such a beautiful array of emotions; therefore that alone tells me we are supposed to allow ourselves to feel otherwise we would not be given the emotions even the ones we call bad....like Anger, like Jealousy, like Fear....on the other end of the spectrum we are also given emotions that appear to some as too good to be true...like Bliss, like Freedom, like Safety, like Worthy...I could go on and on with all kinds of emotions, but the simple truth is that it is okay to feel our feelings. It is okay to be in the moment with what we feel.

What is not okay is if we stay stuck in those feelings and not allow ourselves to feel the others. Sometimes people only want to feel the happiness because that way they can project that (but know speaking as an intuitive being in touch with her truth and her feelings--what is really projected is what they are trying to hide--truth is always seen)..Sometimes people want to feel only that one feeling so much so that they reach for distractions, addictions to "maintain" that feeling, but in truth they are doing a disservice to themselves and others around them for many reasons, not just the obvious. Some may feel that it is okay because it helps them through their "troubled times",  what it is really doing is prolonging the inevitable and keeping the person stuck.   Some allow themselves to get numb and not allow themselves to feel anything but a minimal amount of emotion that is often disguised as a low level of depression.  It is an interesting conundrum that people experience when it comes to depression...they can feel sad for a long time as they work hard not to feel that which is inevitably present or they can feel sad for a short time while working through that situation/emotion.  I know I am simplifying it, but the truth is that it can all disappear when the emotions are expressed and not suppressed. Here is another part of it –when you allow yourself to feel, show who you are at any given moment, it gives others permission to heal/feel/be.  If someone is uncomfortable with your feeling/healing then it simply means you are likely mirroring for them something they are afraid of. We will talk more about mirroring on another day.

For now, the lesson for today is find a constructive way to express/release your feelings.  Cleaning was my way, and after I cleaned, I felt so light afterward and it brought levity to my life.  I choose to greet the challenges as they come rather than running to avoid them. What I notice though is that I meet a lot of people who choose to run from life and life’s challenges by way of distractions or literally, by way of creating more drama in their life to distract people from what the original situation is. I choose to be happy in this moment by embracing life’s challenges and pain. I choose to take things one day at a time and not allow them to pile up.  My plan is to feel and view the world differently than I’ve been taught, differently than putting it aside (I am giving myself the benefit of the doubt—with the concussion I had in addition to all the physical pain I was in—it wasn’t exactly like I could deal with any more, but now I am feeling better and I can deal with a little more…no wonder the anger is coming up now?) 

Some thoughts for you to journal about today and over the next several days…
Look at your life and see where you may be distracting you?  Where are you keeping more drama in your life?  How will you choose to constructively express/release your feelings?

Happy Thanksgiving Message

Happy Thanksgiving beautiful souls!

May you have a day full of blessings and of love with your family and friends.  Today, try and remember who you are, why you are here and what your mission on the planet is—to be love, live love and act love.

Be sure to make up your own gratitude list, but here goes mine:

• I am grateful for all the friends that have been supportive, loving and kind to me on this journey, particularly since my car accident.
• I am grateful for Dr. Kara Fitzgerald who actually listens, hears and understands my health issues that have been neglected by traditional medicine--I'm finally getting better!
• I am grateful that my body is healing (albeit slowly).
• I am grateful that I am still in my apartment—if this is not a miracle—I do not know what is!
• I am grateful that I am finally receiving proper care for my back.
• I am grateful that my twinflame has grown stronger, has more courage and is empowered to speak his truth to me.
• I am grateful that my dreams are coming true.
• I am grateful that my family is growing spiritually.
• I am grateful that my landlord has been so helpful.
• I am grateful for all the spiritual empowerment that has happened for me.
• I am grateful for all my guides, angels, Galatic spiritual team that has helped me to clear and make my path much smoother and beautiful!   

Finally, I am grateful to all of you who have been with me on the this journey and have had the courage to go forward on your own journey and sharing with me along the way.  May blessings fall upon you! :)  Love to you all!! Oh and deep gratitude for those of you who have courage to comment and share a message with me.
Onto a Channel from my beautiful Team of Light, The Arcturian Masters of Light....

but first here is a quote I came across and wanted to share it with you….

“There is not enough darkness in all the world to put out the light
of even one small candle” Robert Alden

This is to you all my dear souls of light, even in those moments

that you felt that it nearly impossible to be the light in your

families you are the light. It doesn’t matter that there is just

you---you are the light of the world and you must be the light.

In a world that seems so dark, we tell you to turn off your

televisions, turn off your radios and tune into your own frequency

for in that frequency you will find light, love and empowerment.

It is far easier to tune in than it is to turn off that which

distracts you, but we say that you can do it. We also say that

you can easily transform your life if you give the pure intention

to do so. It is the time now to step into the grace and beauty

that is truly you. No, dear ones we do not think you should be

fearful of what is to come. Instead we ask you to be expectant

of what is to come for you are the creator Gods of your journey.

What do you wish to create next? Where do you wish to create next?

You can be that one candle wherever you are. You do not need to

be a healer, a teacher or an intuitive to shine your light…you

need only to shine and be that candle wherever you are because

as the quote says with even a small candle glowing it is not darkness.

EstaRa loves the quotes she finds…only she fails to remember

sometimes much of what she finds is just another way of saying

what she already knows, feels and teaches. She is ready to take

you all upon your path of light. Be willing to hear her and listen

for her wisdom grows and knows no bounds. It is with love, honor

and respect that we bring you this message today.~ We are the Masters of Light

Day 10 of 45 Day Journey

So I cry today.  I woke up feeling really good and fulfilled. I accomplished everything I needed to in my house before it was time to head out and run a couple of errands.  As I left my house, I began to experience the madness/craziness of the full moon energy and the unhappiness that pervades society as everyone prepares for a holiday with their family. I have to admit it feels horrible.  I just got back from my errands a little while ago and I cleared my energy as I often do when I have been out and about and likely picking up everyone's stuff.  I sat down and began to feel this overwhelming emotion--I cried to God/Spirit.  "I don't know how to do it!"    "I don't know how to be okay in this moment and the next moment--humanity is tearing each other apart and causing all kinds of pain and struggle for one another." 

I know why I am here---I have always known since I was a small child---it wasn't until the last several that I started truly living!  I mean I have undergone so many things, but the awakening and expansion of my soul was by far the beginning of my life. Prior to that--I wasn't living and the really sad thing is that I see that in so many people--I mean they get up, go to work, get their nails done, go out for drinks, cheer on their sports team and go to bed and do it all over again with a few little differences here and there.  It really makes me sad to see so many people still asleep or choosing to be unaware--the energy is out there--the wake up call is loud and clear and yet many stay in denial.   I cry out to God today..."I know you want me to help, I know you need me to be here, but I can't do it alone anymore. I need help!  I need my beloved with me.  I know he is in pain and suffering too--please help us make it to physical union so we can feel safe, loved and ready to take on our mission fully without being left out in the cold and alone."   I love my life, but moments like these when I see the pain and suffering in humanity and feel the yearning and crying out for love from people I walk by it overwhelms me with grief and pain inside me.  I need your help dear world--please open your hearts, step into your power and make the changes you wish to see for without you we cannot do it.  It is time for all of us to come together in unity and implement the changes we wish to experience.  The tears I feel are real and tears of thousands crying out in silence of the pain they feel in separation--separation from their soul.  I have had such a feeling of resistance the last few weeks and well---I can honestly say that this moon is going to unleash the resistance snap the band and shoot us all further than we thought possible.  I have message for twinflames coming soon--but in the meantime, I must go and be gentle with my heart, body and soul.

Inspirational Snippet: Holiday Healing

Inspirational Snippet: Holiday Healing


Turkey, Stuffing and Cranberry Sauce....Ahhh...The taste of Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
I have to say that this is my favorite holiday. I love the food, of course, as many do, but it is more about the meaning of the holiday; or what I should say the meaning has become for me. It has become an opportunity for me to look at my life and really notice the many things that I am grateful for. It is a great reminder to not take anything for granted. It is also a time that we can share the abundance in our life with our friends and family.

Several years back, I chose to create a Vegan Thanksgiving to celebrate with my family of Light--my friends that are composed of clients, students and friends.  It is always around 11-11 that I do and it is really healing for my soul, my body and my mind.  This is a day when everyone who comes together has actively made a choice to be with one another eating a more healthy array of foods that if I might add are incredibly delicious (I know some of you think that is crazy, but believe you me--the food is beyond delish!)  I love it and it fulfills me!   And I have to say, this was the best year yet for food--and here is a little secret--most people in attendance are not Vegan, but for one day a year they can come together and get creative out of love for one another--to me that is what the holiday is about--sharing, caring, gratitude and loving.

Still the real holidays are approaching, and I usually spend the holidays at my parents with my brothers and their children.  There is nothing like my mom's idea of Thanksgiving. You grow up with certain family traditions and that is what you are looking for around the holidays...I don't know about everyone, but that is how I feel. I love my family traditions of food at Thanksgiving--it really feels great to be Italian, Polish and Ukrainian--those cultures for me have such yummy foods; how can one resist?
Several years ago, I made the decision to not go to my family's for Thanksgiving. It was a difficult decision for me at best. I decided to use my voice and take a stand for what I believe to be important. My stand was to not attend my family holiday gathering because of the lack of respect I felt directed towards me from my brothers. I really love my family, but I didn't always feel good when I went there for the holidays. My brothers were angry and they took it out on me. They do not like what I do for a living. They would make fun of me and talk badly about what I do which made it very uncomfortable for all the people in attendance including my little nieces. While I don't accept their thoughts as mine, the behavior was very disrespectful and can be quite harmful to my energy. It seemed the more content I had gotten with my life over the last few years, my brothers seemed to have gotten angrier. Is that the case? Or is it that I am or have gotten to a more balanced experience with my feelings that I can't relate or allow as much as I may have allowed in the past?

In case you are wondering, yes, I do understand their stuff is not about me; however, the negative energy does impact me and I have a choice to experience it or not. I even understand the lessons associated with this and the deeper spiritual healing piece, but what I am writing about today is the human experience and my choice of not taking part in something I deem to be unhealthy for me physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I don't think family gatherings should be disrespectful and not to mention they just shouldn't make you feel so bad. The energy can be harmful to not only the person made to feel uncomfortable, but everyone there.

I know holidays can be dysfunctional and families can be crazy--I mean they make many movies about it and perhaps they will make one about mine someday too!  But honestly, all joking aside, the experience can be toxic to our intuitive natures. It is not pleasant to "feel" under attack at a place that is supposed to be safe. It was hard to make this decision not to go to my parents that year, but I think because I did that, it helped me heal with them.  My family's interaction with me began to change after that and while we are not all on the same page--perhaps not even in the same book, it is tolerable, safe and a much warmer climate at the family gatherings.

Over the years, I have done a lot of things that I didn't want to do out of guilt and obligation so as to keep everyone in the family happy. Does this sound familiar?  It really is a common thing that a lot of us tend to do; make decisions that would cause the least amount of problems for the family even if it isn't in your best interest. The truth is that we often worry about everyone else and forget about our own needs and how we may be affected by those choices.  Each time we make a choice in favor of someone else over our needs, we give away our power.  Feeling powerless leads to so many things, like low self-esteem, depression, guilt, shame to name a few.

I decided a long time ago that the only person who could make me happy is me so I made the choice to make me happy that Thanksgiving. I want to feel loved, safe and at peace. I explained to my parents as best as I could; that it was not because I didn't love them, but I was not attending because I felt like my brothers should treat me with respect. I truly do not believe that it is too much to ask. I mean I don't agree with stuff that my brothers do, but I just accept that is what they chose and go on.

This message is for all of you to absorb/feel/comprehend/experience for yourself and to evaluate how you feel about holidays.  We shouldn't have to prepare to go a holiday gathering (or to our family's home for that matter), we shouldn't have to feel afraid of what may happen, anxious about the expectations; and ultimately we shouldn't have to do anything that jeopardizes our safety/happiness/inner light.
Wishing you all a Happy Thanksgiving this week.

Love to you,
EstaRa

My New 45 Day Journey

Hello Everyone,

I am on a new 45 day journey to transformation in preparation for the upcoming new year.  I can hardly believe that we are already thinking about a new year---but with the way time has moved rapidly forward, I can't help but think I want to capture it now!   

Today is Day 3 and I am sharing a message from last year's class because the truth is that we always need to be reminded of our powerful I am presence on this planet.  We have so much more power than we have been led to believe and it is the space after the words "I am."  

While I know this very clearly, I have to admit that sometimes I get caught up in the "I am cold. I am tired.  I am frustrated. " phrases.  Instead, I know I should be saying and sometimes I do correct them to "I feel cold. I feel tired.  I feel frustrated."  But it can be hard because we have a constant societal way of speaking that doesn't make the "I feel" statements as easy to carry out. 

Here is a message from Yeshua on the "I am"

Several years ago, I would often go to Our Lady of Lourdes Shrine, in Litchfield, CT for peace and sanctuary particularly when I lived in Bristol. I would often take someone with me to experience the peace and beauty,  but truly I preferred to go there alone I got more out of it for me.  So one day (gosh it has to be 11-13 years ago now), I was walking down the "Stations of the Cross" (for those of you who do not know what that is, to put it as simply as possible it is a path that resembles the story of Jesus from death to resurrection).  Near the end of the "Stations", Yeshua (Jesus prefers to be called his Hebrew name) greeted me and walked with me.  "I am the way."  He must have repeated it three times before I stopped to listen to him and understood, really understood for the first time ever! 

He said:

"I am the way.  I am (not me the person), but the "I AM" is the way. This is the divinity of God within you and it is your power to create in this earthly realm. Whatever words, thoughts, feelings you place after the words "I AM" creates your reality in the physical world you live in."   ~Yeshua

At that point that was by far one of the most profound experiences I have had with Yeshua.  It taught me so much, I remember crying and being really excited with this information, but I had no one to share it with.  Back then, I was still transitioning out of my old life and burgeoning on birthing my new life. The message above is just as significant today as it was back then.   Last year, Yeshua stood beside me to fill in the gaps and to add more information for me, for us. 

"It will take you many years to fully comprehend and embody this truth for you will have to undergo deconstruction of a program that has been deeply embedded in your DNA and cellular memory, for when you have incarnated into human form on this planet, you have taken on the prevailing consciousness and your job is to rise above that consciousness to help humanity change the very consciousness that i/has been holding humanity back.  I will assist you dear one, to reclaim your divinity and essence of light that you are, and have been taught to believe you are not.  You are not a sinner from birth, for you are the light and love of God, the creator of all. As humanity begins to awaken and question what they have been told to believe the more quickly the energy will move upon the planet and the more quickly consciousness will begin to resemble the light that you are.  Your powers of creation are more magnificent than you can imagine from your limited human perspective. Look into your heart and begin to see the transformation of your very being." –Yeshua
Something to truly ponder, what words do you put after your “I am”?   This is journal worthy—take a gander and make a list.  I know one of mine is “I am tired.”  I have to find a new way to convey I am tired perhaps coming up with something like “I feel energized”…Maybe I can reprogram a tired body to feel energized with that simple of words. J  It might be worth trying because I can’t tell you how many times I say “I’m tired in a day , week, month…”
 
If you are interested in joining me on this 45 day journey--there is still time because we are only on Day 3! 

 This will take us to year's end where we will close the year by way of letting go of the past and beginning a new year from a transformed, new personal power within us. I am offering two ways for you to enjoy this opportunity:  First, for free you can follow my personal journey of self discovery on my blog at: www.aprildamato.blogspot.com where I will make some posts with updates/experiences I'm having for the next 45 days (I have to admit to all of you that I am not consistent with my blog because of other events that are taking place in my life), beginning Sunday, November 16th to Wednesday, December 31st.  OR you may choose to have messages delivered directly to your email which will include tools for removing negativity in your life, tools to refocus yourself, tools for letting go, tools for falling in love with you as well as intuitive messages and shares for your journey. The email option is more personalized and focused on tools for transforming you from now until the end of the year for a small fee of $33.00  Click here to Buy Now. The choice is yours and I hope you join in one of the two ways.   The timing is perfect for the new year—believe me I’ve experienced the magic last year!  (If you know me and have seen me lately—you will be amazed at the physical healing transformation I’ve made and I attribute it to the class last year helping me to refocus, along with making way for proper care to come my way!   Below is a more clearly written description of this class.

Here is a clearer description.

45 Days of Transformation, Inspiration & Magical Treats!
Monday,November 16 (Receive at Your Preferred Time)
Take this opportunity to begin a new year by preparing your body, mind, spirit for the 45 days before.  This email will include tools for changing your thoughts, tools for refocusing yourself, tools for letting go, tools for self love and more. This email class will provide you with all you need to prepare to manifest magic in the new year. Are you ready to hold a positive attitude, stay focused on your plans and recharge your batteries?  Now is the time. Energy Exchange: $33.00  Click here to Buy Now